The rise and rise of slow sex



London – What does contemporary womanhood require to nourish, sustain and detoxify it?

Orgasmic living,” says Nicole Daedone, the author of a popular book, Slow Sex: The Art and Craft of the Female Orgasm, and a website,, which is sweeping the US”.

Slow sex”, as taught at Daedone’s OneTaste retreats in San Francisco and New York, promises to deliver reliable orgasms for women frustrated, blocked or bored by sex.

But more profoundly, and for both sexes, it attempts to meet our “fundamental hunger to connect with another human being”, a need frequently left unsatisfied, Daedone says, in our time-poor and intimacy-averse culture.

Daedone can’t claim to have invented the slow-sex movement. As you might expect, Italy’s slow-food movement produced its own offshoot back in the mid-2000s. Teachers of tantra, who have been turning Westerners on to the benefits of ritual and massage since the 1960s, might also claim that they pioneered a form of intercourse that supplies what Daedone calls “sustainability, nourishment and connection”.

Yet as a cultural phenomenon, Daedone’s success is fascinating and significant.

Sexually evolved women, some predict, will soon be retiring their comically hideous Rampant Rabbits in favour of massage oil, scented candles and rose petals.

For proof of the explosion of interest in “spiritual” sex, just look at Amazon, where nearly 40 books on the subject will have been published by the end of this year alone.

Daedone, of course, argues that she’s not surfing a trend, but meeting a genuine need, something on which many women may find themselves agreeing. These days, our sexualised culture seems to offer a synthetic, commodified and ostentatiously visual model for sexual relations, when what most of us secretly crave is connection, intimacy and the capacity to simply be in the moment.


Tags: , , , , , , ,

Categories: Sex

One Comment on “The rise and rise of slow sex”

  1. bwglynn
    September 8, 2013 at 10:27 pm #

    I’m all for women having more orgasms. I vote ‘yay’.

Talk to me baby

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s